On Gourmet Meals

There's no place like home for the holidays, and rightly so. At this stressful time of year, who else would put up with you besides your family? Excuse me, I'm making the assumption that they do tolerate you. Whether or not you're spending this wintry season alone, with friends, family, or all of the above, you know what it's all about: the food. Quit trying to be so fancy. You're not.

In the middle of all the mess that comes along with a reunited family is the attempted culinary sophistication that invariably happens in nearly every kitchen across the globe. Instead of sticking to simple favorites, this seems the appropriate time to craft something complicated under the pressure of knowing that your in-laws are watching and judging from just beyond the stove top. Who needs caviar, escargot, kalamari, or any other slimy, slightly fish-y excuse for an hors d'oeuvre cluttering the tablescape?* Not I. Chuck the fancy vocabulary of braising, broiling, sautéing, flambéing, pureeing, kneading, scalding, and worst of all, cooking. You're not as lofty as you think you are when you talk like that. You just sound like an idiot.

It's hard not to focus on foodstuffs at this time of year, and healthy foodstuffs at that. We're staving off winter's chill with hot toddies and fresh cookies and a turkey or three or four. Thanksgiving is Hallmark's best excuse to wish you were wearing pants with an elastic waistband, and Christmas cookies are where it's at, not Christmas carrots. Plus, the more cookies you leave for the children to eat, the more hyper they'll be and the more places you'll find frosting when you clean next month. So really, you're doing everyone a favor by taking these sugary delights off their hands.

You're not Bobby Flay (and thank goodness, because he's obnoxious), so quit trying to be. Take it easy on yourself and those cooking with you and do what you know. What's wrong with Kraft Macaroni & Cheese on Thanksgiving? Absolutely nothing!

The point is to be thankful; the importance of the season is your attitude. So lay back, relax. Be yourself - and express that with how and what you cook. Watch the Macy's Parade and spike the eggnog. It's all in the spirit of giving, after all.

*Let it be noted that "tablescape" is a shout-out to Sandra Lee of the Food Network and all of her awful, awful awful ideas, catch phrases, and stand mixers that match her outfits. *